giving love always

Treasure those who matter, because we never know how long God is lending them to us. ☺️

We never know when our last time seeing them would be, nor do we know which Whatsapp message to them would be our last.

Give love, always!

maybe

Maybe, just maybe, we should have swallowed our pride and put our egos aside for those who matter.

to the best

For always putting up with me and my horrible, ridiculous antics, for being a source of inspiration, for having faith, for bringing out the best in me...

... you deserve the very best in life.

brexit

Soooo... You ever wonder what PMS is all about? 

Ok, sit back, relax, and let me tell you a story. 

This monstrosity took place just a couple of hours ago, set in a classroom of eight students. Anything the teacher said is in bold.

"Anyone knows why investors aren't very confident to invest in the UK at the moment?" 

Silence. Teacher expects an answer.

I thought about it. Err... dunno... OH wait... Is it because we don't know whether the UK is going out of the EU, so we can't really predict the economy if it DOES exit the EU?

Prolonged silence.

"Anyone remember? We did this (during the) last lesson."

We did talk about exiting the EU, right? But waaaaait what else did we discuss on Wednesday? Ummm something about trains, is that relevant? 

I looked at Thatana and Nelynn. Guys say something! It's been 30 whole seconds of silence. Please save us. If I could turn around without being obvious, I would have undoubtedly looked at everyone else, because goshhh my classmates are super smart, they make me feel extremely tiny every time. 

"Starts with B..."

At this point, I knew for sure that I was wrong. The UK going out of the EU doesn't exactly start with a B, nor does that sentence has any B in it.

"Brexit."

OH. British Exit. Britain exiting the EU.

Talk about the sweet taste of disappointment. 

Fast forward to approximately five minutes before the end of the lesson. 

"What's the formula for productivity?" 

Well, productivity is output per worker, right? So... number of output over number of workers? 

Teacher looked at us, we looked at teacher... repeat 10 times. "Number of output over number of workers."

NOT AGAIN. For goodness sake, Sabrina, next time, speak up. Don't be such a coward, chances are you're right and you'll feel good! And even if you're wrong, who cares! What matters is you try. That's what counts. 

So, next question. "What's the formula for unit labour cost?" 

This is it. It's time. There's no turning back now. You got this, you're larger than life. Do it. "Umm... average cost over number of workers?" I blurted. (Let's all ignore the fact that my "answer" came out as a question.)

Silence. My pail of confidence rolled down the hill. So much for dreaming big. 

"Um... total... cost... over number of workers?" I tried again, albeit fully convinced that I was going to get it wrong nonetheless. Yolo.

"Close. Total cost over output." 

OF COURSE. Of course I would have the worst possible timing. Whyyyy is it that every time I do try, it somehow ends up false? 

But hey, it's no problem, we learn from mistakes... I'm totally chill... whoa wait what... what are my eyes doing? Oh my God, are they... watering? OMG. DON'T FALL. DON'T EMBARRASS YOURSELF MORE THAN YOU ALREADY DID. 

DON'T YOU DARE DO THIS TO ME, EYES, NOT RIGHT NOW. 

By the time class ended, I had two whole buckets of water. But phew, there wasn't even a single drop. I'm too cool for that. I blinked them away, feeling cool and composed.

The moment I stepped out of the room, BAM, Niagara Falls. Which lasted longer than I would ever admit.

No, I didn't cry, sheesh, I'm cool. A mere leakage problem was all.

Just them PMS hormones being a drama queen, anyway. *Flips tudung.*

into november

2 months has passed since summer break.

Ok, let's see what I've been doing in this country so far.

Coping terribly with LDR, moved houses twice, endured countless rereading of a very cheesy personal statement, ate too much Ben & Jerry's (I'm taking advantage. Neither Jason's nor Jaya Grocer can beat the flavour range and price here), braved bad Skype connections, figured how to use the washing machine (and the dryer!!! unfortunately I can never tell what I can or can't put in, do they really need that many symbols just to ruin my favourite 2012 Olympics tee), drooled outside the Mulberry store, learnt how to make Nasi Lemak (scratch that, I've forgotten it by now.)

And oh... I almost forgot! Second year of A Levels.

What is life...

not doing that

IT'S ONLY THE SECOND DAY KEEP YOUR PHONES AWAY PLEASE

And then we went to Ain's, where monkeys broke loose.

Um... ok... do whatever that thing you guys want...

"Let's do this!" someone exclaimed, demonstrating a certain pose. 

"Oh no no that's it I'm out of here."

Ok, that picture in the recipe book is totally photoshopped. I'm officially starting a stop-setting-unrealistic-expectations-2K15 movement.

May God accept it from us and from you.

two sentences

So I'm back in Malaysia. Again.

And I'm just going to put down two lines here: 

1. Please kindly return a smile. 

2. Always remember to say thank you, and when someone thanks you, acknowledge their gratitude. 

cringe cringe cringe

NO MORE SCHOOL FOR THE YEAR WOOOO.

Total distance: HeHeHeHe 

Lower Sixth Form Recap

Maths

• love my teacher 
• my only female teacher
• her smile is blinding masyaAllah 
• the only homework we have is to do past papers

Further Maths

• tests started with a good 'ol 80%
• then I made a 44% 
• then I knocked some sense into myself 
• tests were better towards the end of the year 

Physics

• you can be 2 seconds late
• that's 0.2% lesson lost to you
• the jokes oh my God
• HAND IN HOMEWORK 9 AM MONDAY or DIE
• I'm beginning to love Physics
• well except Particles
• why do people study tiny little things 

Economics

• teacher won't progress unless somebody at least try to answer questions
• most of the time I just yolo
• and then cringe later
• I still cringe at stupid answers I made months ago 
• I feel like dying every time

Jokes aside; my teachers are amazing, brilliant and talented educators who are all very passionate about their subjects. 

(cepat cepat cover)

susah tak?

This story took place that one time when Amalin came to London and DID NOT BRING MY FABER CASTELL LEAD like I politely asked her to. 

Anyway. 

We met up at the London Eye. Actually, no, I met up with her parents whilst she abandoned me, choosing that overrated wheel over me. Priorities man, I'm telling you.

I spent a little over an hour with her parents. They were cool, and I now have much blackmail material.

Somewhere on the banks of the River Thames, Aunty Mahani asked me, "Macam mana? Susah tak kat sini?" 

I thought about it. I have never ironed a single thing here, my tudung is constantly crumpled, I can't wait to go home in two weeks and bring my tudungs with me. It's been three months. Wait no, I can't tell her that, that'd be weird, quick make something up.

"Oh... susah jugak. Kena seterika baju, belajar berdikari..." - and I went on about how I had to take the bus, alone at that, yadda yadda.

She looked at me odd. Then she blinked.

"Maksud makcik, susah tak belajar? Study semua ok?"

Oh. Ohhh.

Why I always embarrass myself will never cease to be a wonder.

Um, Ain, my Photoshop proficiency is six feet underground, but we can all assume you're floating on the water somewhere. 

you know what

Okay imagine: bad tudung day. Your best friend is absent. Your Maths was 1% short of a 100 (???). That teacher didn't smile back at you. To top it all, Marissa cut your queue during lunch and acted like it was no big deal.

Ok, now, you have a choice.

a) You tell your best friend about Marissa.

You know, so today, I was queuing for roti canai, and I waited for so long, then suddenly Marissa went to the front, just because she said she asked the other girl to jaga her queue. So rude man. And then, the other day, oh my God... She was just too stubborn! I mean it's a group work, but she wouldn't listen to our opinion. She's so egoistic, never admitting that she can make mistakes too... 

b) You let go. 

Maybe Marissa had a rough day too, she forgot her etiquette. Maybe she wasn't brought up the way you did - she didn't get the love, affection and parental guidance you were blessed with. Maybe Marissa could do better, had she known that what she did wasn't exactly pleasant. Maybe underneath all that, she has a heart of gold, even better than yours. Maybe sometimes, whether I notice it or not, I do the little pesky things Marissa does too... Or maybe, Marissa desperately needed to pee, if she queued any longer... 

"O you who have believed, avoid much (negative) assumption... And do not spy or backbite each other... " (Quran, Al Hujurat, 49:12)

Who on earth eats roti canai for lunch anyway...

Edit: Several people congratulated me for the "99%". It's not me la it's YOU hahaha. And asked who this Marissa person is. She doesn't exist, this story is completely made up. Hehe.

shoe-safe guarantee

Back in the land of calorie-laden food! 

Sure, fun to see my family and all that, but let's focus on the main point here...

Is it just me, or boutiques are crazy popping up in Bangi? I'm not a jubah person (as you would already know...) but man, these places have the nicest jubahs in the world. 

We went to several stores with Aunty M to choose her birthday present (fail). Our efforts weren't in vain though, because I did learn something that day - well, more like, pondered something.

WHY DO BOUTIQUES ASK US TO TAKE OFF OUR SHOES?!

I assume the logic behind shoe removal is for hygiene reasons, or they're worried we'll get their wooden floors pierced by stiletto heels?

But what if some people feel exposed or vulnerable upon removing their shoes? And how would you guarantee that we'll see them again when we leave the store? You never know if a cat would nick those shoes outside, do you...

Some don't even give salaam! Please, go ahead and coldly look at me in the eye and then ignore me, so nice to shop here.

Bahahah forgive me, clearly something horrible has gotten into me.

God's little (big) gift

Shoutout to the most beautiful people out there, whoever you are!

I think it really is a blessing from God when you know how to make people happy, and how you radiate happiness to those around you. I mean, masyaAllah dude you just know all sorts of way to bring happiness to people.

Say you might get a teeny weeny bit sad or frustrated when people don't do the same to you, but friend, they might not have the same talent as you do... forgive them, yeah?

If you feel unappreciated because they don't do the same in return, don't worry, I'm sure Allah has lots in store for you, and who knows, somebody, too, has been praying for your well-being, day and night. 

Keep up the good work! 

I pray that Allah will grant you eternal happiness, here, and in the afterlife.

how do you skirt

Ignore those pictures. That's just Amalin blocking what would have been some beautiful view. Bahah.

How do people wear maxi skirts? Do they have a superpower that I know nothing about? 

I could pull skirts off with baju kurung, but other than that, I truly, truly, fail.

I know Amalin puts on skirts for everyday use, and I thought, what would it hurt right? I was wrong.

It keeps touching the floor oh my God. Plus it's soooo flowy and smooth it's weird. I have no idea what I did, but the skirt managed to get a tiny smudge of mud on it and I. just. wanted. my. pants. back. OK??? I don't deserve this kind of pure torture. Whoever invented pants (and high heels), I love you.

Needless to say, I only wore the skirt once. It's been in the closet ever since. 

And then, there are girls whose skirts are their travel staples - be it a trip to the zoo, beach picnic with all the wet sand in the world, climbing up the Eiffel tower - let's face it, they might even go the Amazonian jungles in a skirt.

I'm pretty sure this is sorcery, guys. 

blue skies ahead

Bla bla bla, me mumbling some stuff. 

Endless Horizon, Blue Skies Ahead

Do you recall sleepless nights, group discussions over lunch, copying and trading notes with your classmates last November? If your answers are yes, yes and yes, I'm guessing you are one amongst 455,849 students who sat for the Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia (SPM) in 2014. Allow me to extend a hearty congratulations to you!

In 2014, a total of 11,289 students scored straight As in the examination, a slight dip compared to 13,970 students in 2013. Additionally, there is a decrease in the national average grade (GPN), which measures overall performance in the examination. A lower score indicates better achievement, and for 2014, the GPN was 5.08, a short fall of 0.15 from 4.93 in 2013.

How anxious were you on the day results came out? Did you compare your A, B or Cs with your friends and relatives? Put that aside. Just as every snowflake is unique, there could be one hundred reasons for that difference in your number of As. 

Some of us may have exceeded our expectations, whilst some of us may have not. Be optimistic, for opportunities are endless. I know many wonderful, awesomely talented peers whose true potential cannot be measured with their grades. What matters most is the courage, personality and perseverance to explore the new possibilities beyond SPM, not your numbers and letters. Once you have these three keys checked, you will achieve even greater heights. 

Life is bigger than SPM. Look further, my friends!

http://niexter.nst.com.my/2015/03/

Shut up shut up... so what if I used my housemate's History textbook...

the big bang

This post has been taken down by the author. 

expecto patronum

my 2:00 a.m. live stream 

Alhamdulillah alhamdulillah alhamdulillah. Amalin, Ain and Adlin and Amirah are total naturals, I had to strongly refrain myself from saying I told you so. 

Of course, everything comes from God and Alhamdulillah I have so much to thank Allah for. 

So whilst they are busy with applications here and there... I'll just sit and munch on Kettle. Like, oh look, is that an anxious Amirah in front of a white-fanged, red-eyed interviewer? Haha is that Ain being asked questions by a soul-sucking dementor? COOL. Serves them right for ignoring me on Whatsapp. *eats more chips* 

Mum & Dad's tips on How To gET IT AAAALLLLLL 

Part 1: Applications & Interviews

1. Hey peeps I'm here to show off all my golds

Be humble. But not too humble. Bahahah. If they ask you, what are your hobbies? Don't just stop at "Oh I like to draw." Add on, "I do illustrations for school magazine, and I once sold a portrait for five million US dollars, also I find Leonardo Da Vinci's artwork very fascinating, even my phone case is Van Gogh blablabla" Ok maybe you haven't sold a USD 5,000,000 yet, how would I know.

2. That form doesn't do you justice

I'm telling you, those forms don't have enough space for you to brag. Come on, only three boxes for co-curricular activities? Pfft. You do volunteer work, you recycled stuff, you did socially-desirable YouTube videos - yet you can't put those on application forms. What do you do? This is when you tell them. Alternatively, you prepare a CV (curriculum vitae) and submit it with your form. GAME ON GUYS.

3. Remember that time when you said your hobby was reading

It's okay. Me too. It's all surfing the internet now. But if your wish is to go into Economics, for example, if they ask you what books you read, omg are you honestly prepared to say If I Stay. Read a whole lot of Economics-related books and articles. If you need ideas, I've just finished Martin Lindstrom's Buy-ology and Tim Harford's The Undercover Economist series. (available on MPH online)

4. Be the creep you really are (Amalin we all know you're a creep)

Remember their name. Ok, sorry, didn't mean to sound that cray, but you see that lady who's about to interrogate interview you? Remember her name and title. She'll think highly of you if the first thing you do when you come into the room is, Hello, selamat pagi Professor X. This may sound a bit braggish, but heeeeeey, each time I do this, I win every time. #yay #perasan #berlagak #alabolehlaberlagak 

5. We're cool right? Right?

First things first - be comfortable. Ask your interviewers, How are you? Start a casual conversation, once you've established this, it's more convenient and natural for you to show off. Haha. Don't even feel embarrassed, or care about the fact that they'll judge (because obviously that's the whole point of the interview). Chances are, you're not going to see them ever again after the session anyway. 

6. Dear adults read my heart out

Why do you want to study that particular subject? What are you going to do after you finish studying? What have you done that led you to think that you suit that course? What are your biggest, deepest wish and dreams? To whom or what do you give your passion to? Whip them all up in a 500-word personal statement.

Oh yeah, well, you know, if interviewers get too difficult, just expecto patronum them.

prayer room, again?!

Everyday, I have to put up with two goons.

One from Shanghai, and one from (what are the odds) Kajang.

No, seriously, I'm not even kidding.

1. 

"Wait wait I don't get it. Why is it that you wear headscarf, then you don't, then at the hair salon you need a private room but you still need to take off your headscarf anyway? When do you need to wear it?"

I explained.

"Oh. Ohhh. So you don't wear your headscarf around me because I'm a girl... I thought you took it off because I'm your friend and you love me. I'm very disappointed in you, Sab."

2.

We were on Twitter.

A friend of mine retweeted a video, of a 16-year-old hijabbed girl in London, who, out of the blue, got hit by a man. The girl fell unconscious afterwards.

We were both speechless.

"Oh my god. I will protect you, don't worry."

"Maybe you should wear a hat. That way, people can't see your headscarf."


3.

"We're going to London for tea today, okay?"

"Yeah, okay, not too late though, I need to pray."

"You didn't pray the other day when we went to London?"

"She was on her period." Silence. "Umm... you were on your period, right?"


4.

The three of us were pointlessly chattering in my bedroom.

"I don't think I could ever hate you."

"Oh?"

"Except, maybe, when you won't eat my food because it's not Halal."

"But I do when you give me Halal food!"

"Yeah, that's because I'm smart now and I know what Halal food is."


5.

"No gelatine, I checked. For the first time in my life, I actually read ingredients!"


6.

"My mum told me Muslims pray before they eat..."

I acted cool on the outside, but in the inside, I'm all bismillaahi awwalahu wa 'akhirahu ya Allah forgive me I will try my best to remember to baca doa next time I'm so sorry ya Allah.

7.

"Go canteen first, I'm going to the prayer room."

"Again?!"


Yes, my dear, I know I went to the prayer room yesterday. And the day before. And probably tomorrow, too.

three meals

Blimey we have three different timezones now.

take it back

Sometime in 2014, we were at the kampung. 

We had just visited Abah's uncle, who is about 70 years old, and is ailing. His children (aka dad's cousins) were all providing TLC for him - and Abah helps, too.

"Now, if I get sick when I'm older, you'd take care of me, like how I'm helping him."

I looked at Abah. He looked at me. 

It was a few seconds of silence, when I finally said, "No."

He was taken aback; No????

"I mean, like, you're not going to be sick, so don't put it that way. I'd care and love you and annoy you  forever, but you'd still be healthy when you're old, okay?"

"Take it back, daddy. Take it back."

"Say that I'll take care of a healthy and happy you, and you and Mama would go yachting and do all the things retired people do, you won't be sick."

"Take it back. NOW."

Abah looked it at me as if I had just lost my brain and stashed it somewhere I can never get it back.

"Okay... you'll take care of a healthy and happy me..." 

Good.

I believe that one should always, always, have a positive outlook on life, do good things, and let Allah handle the rest. 

Live good, pray good, and Allah will make it good for you.

I pray everyday that Allah will take care of my parents, keep them in the pink of health, and never let any harm touch them. 

I want them to be healthy; for them to be able to help others, to be closer to Allah by discovering more of Allah's magnificent creation in every country that they go as they travel, and to inspire their children to become better, exemplary Muslims as they go along. 

"My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up when I was small." (Quran, 17:24)

May Allah safeguard our parents always, and may kindness and compassion towards them be instilled in our hearts.

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first milestone

I'm proud to announce that I am finally a grown up.

I MOVED OUT OF THE HOUSE OH MY GOD.

Amalin says I'd never experience the whole sekolah asrama experience, but heeeeey, look who's the brave and independent one now, 10 539 km away some more. Heheh.

I am truly ready to face adult adventures, like, you know, living alone, buying a house, riding dragons and all that.

Shush... what's this shut up you'll be back in 3 months you're saying? I can't hear you, sorry.

Needless to say, I'm 10 539 km closer to Colin now.

Um Dad, I'm 10 539 km closer to Colin now simply means I'm going to study hard, nothing to worry about... trust me.